Ready for blockbusters? Hollywood is

DANIEL NEMAN
Media General News Service
Published: May 20, 2008

Published: May 19, 2008

Call it season creep.

The first day of summer officially is June 21 — more than a month away. In the minds of students, the first day of summer traditionally is Memorial Day, which is in a week.

But this year, Hollywood decreed that summer arrive early. The cinematic solstice, incredibly, was May 2, which marked the release of the first summer blockbuster, “Iron Man.”

It was followed last weekend by “Speed Racer” and this weekend by “The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian.”

This year, one potential blockbuster follows another, and another and another. Winter and spring have been death at the box office, but so many strong possibilities are lined up that this summer may shape up to be one of the best.

Among the biggest films may be the following (opening dates are subject to change):

”The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian” — Opened Friday. The second of seven Narnia films, this one finds the children of the first story back in the magical land, only it’s 1,300 Narnia years later. An evil king is ruling, and it is up to the heroic youngsters (plus God figure Aslan) to return the deposed prince to his rightful throne.

“Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull” — Thursday. Perhaps the most eagerly awaited film of the summer comes 19 years after the last Indiana Jones flick (the one with Sean Connery) and 24 years after the second one (the one with monkey brains). Harrison Ford — 65 and looking fit — returns as the iconic adventurer, with Cate Blanchett as a Soviet villainess, Shia LaBeouf as a sidekick and Karen Allen back as Marion, the love interest from the first movie.

“Sex and the City: The Movie” — May 30. The hugely influential TV show hits the big screen, with the four kiss-and-telling friends regrouping for the wedding of Carrie (Sarah Jessica Parker) and Mr. Big (Chris Noth). Expect insights, comedy and ludicrously expensive shoes.

“You Don’t Mess With the Zohan” — June 6. Adam Sandler stars in this comedy as a super-agent for the Mossad who comes to New York to be a hairdresser. When terrorists learn his real identity, his particular talents as a spy have to come into play. Co-written by Sandler, Robert Smigel and Judd Apatow — the first of three comedies this summer to bear the ubiquitous Apatow imprint.

“Kung Fu Panda” — June 6. An animated comedy features the voice of Jack Black as a lazy panda who loves watching kung fu. When an evil snow leopard threatens the valley, he has to actually learn and perform kung fu to save the valley’s placid way of life.

“The Happening” — June 13. M. Night Shyamalan’s latest thriller pictures an America endangered by a biological disaster that kills whole areas of people. Among the survivors, at least temporarily, are Mark Wahlberg and Zooey Deschanel.

“The Incredible Hulk” — June 13. The 2003 version of this comic-book story was a total flop. This time, Edward Norton stars as the scientist who turns into a green, ‘roid-raging monster whenever he becomes upset. Directed by Louis Leterrier, who made the tough-as-nails “Unleashed” and the incredibly stupid (but not unenjoyable) “Transporter 2.”

“Get Smart” — June 20. The TV show, created by Mel Brooks and Buck Henry, last aired in 1970, making this the most out-of-date remake of the year. But Steve Carell is an inspired choice to play the comically inept spy Maxwell Smart. Anne Hathaway co-stars as his considerably more capable cohort, Agent 99, who sometimes even sports a Barbara Feldon hairdo.

“The Love Guru” — June 20. Mike Myers, who co-wrote, stars as a guru brought back to Canada to help fix the marriage of a hockey player (Romany Malco), thus saving the Stanley Cup hopes of the team owned by Jessica Alba. The coach is played by Verne Troyer, best known as Mini-Me in “Austin Powers.”

“Wall.E” — June 27. An adorably bedraggled robot, alone for 700 years, receives a visit from slick robots from outer space, who take him with them on an adventure of discovery and even robot love. An animated family film from the fertile minds at Pixar.

“Hancock” — July 2. After years of superhero movies, this is a superantihero movie. Will Smith stars as a down-on-his-luck superhero who has turned into a dissolute jerk. He hires a PR guy (Justin Bateman) to help rehabilitate his image but then tries to sleep with the PR guy’s wife (Charlize Theron). Former Richmonder Vince Gilligan co-wrote the comedic script.

“Hellboy II: The Golden Army” — July 11. Really? They made a sequel to a movie that lost a fair amount of money at the box office? Director Guillermo del Toro must be awfully hot after “Pan’s Labyrinth” to get that kind of treatment. Ron Perlman returns as the sardonic, immortal demi-demon who must keep rebellious mythical creatures from destroying humanity.

“Meet Dave” — July 11. Eddie Murphy looks to be a normal human but is in fact a human-shaped spaceship attempting to navigate the streets of New York to set up an invasion. The tiny pilot inside the spaceship is also played by Eddie Murphy. Directed by the guy who made “Norbit” and “The Shaggy Dog.”

“The Dark Knight” — July 18. The third Batman franchise continues with this sequel to “Batman Begins,” starring Christian Bale as the moody yet wealthy fighter of crime. He goes up against The Joker again (Heath Ledger, in his last role). Also involved is Two-Face (this time played by Aaron Eckhart).

“Mamma Mia!” — July 18. It isn’t the patched-together story that makes this Broadway show a hit (a bride tries to determine which of three men is her father) — it’s the music by ABBA. Meryl Streep stars as the, um, socially expansive mother, with Amanda Seyfried as the fatherless bride.

“Brideshead Revisited” — July 25. The 1981 BBC version is arguably the greatest television series ever shown (if you want to hold for “Band of Brothers,” we won’t stop you). So this movie version of a post-WWI end of innocence — and a triumph of religion — is “Brideshead Revisited,” revisited.

“Step Brothers” — July 25. Summer comedy No. 2 for Apatow, this time as a producer. Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly star as middle-aged men who become stepbrothers, are forced to live together and suddenly begin acting like bickering children.

“The X-Files: I Want to Believe” — July 25. The filmmakers want to believe that the once-popular “X-Files” TV show still has an audience. In this film, women are missing and it sounds like a job for the paranormal-investigating X-Files squad in the FBI — only it was disbanded years ago. And Mulder and Scully (David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson) don’t want to bring it back again.

“The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor” — Aug. 1. Brendan Fraser returns for the third time as an adventurer battling a bunch of very old undead people, this time in China. Michelle Yeoh plays a 2,000-year-old sorceress.

“Swing Vote” — Aug. 1. The entire presidential campaign comes down to a single vote, which will be cast by an amiable loser played by Kevin Costner. All the candidates descend on him, hoping to win his support.

“Pineapple Express” — Aug. 8. Apatow comedy No. 3, again as a producer. Seth Rogan stars as a lackadaisical pothead who has to go on the lam when he witnesses a murder involving a crooked cop and a drug dealer.

“Star Wars: The Clone Wars” — Aug. 15. An animated film based on a video game, which was based on animated three-minute shorts, which were based on “Star Wars: Episode II — Attack of the Clones,” which was based on “Star Wars: Episode I — The Phantom Menace,” which was based on the original three “Star Wars” movies, which were good.

“Tropic Thunder” — Aug. 15. In this comedy, action actors filming a war movie in the jungle do not know that the people acting as their enemies aren’t acting. Written and directed by Ben Stiller, with Robert Downey Jr. as a white actor who colors his skin to look black and then starts to think he is black.

“Hamlet 2” — Aug. 20. One last comedy. When his high school drama department is about to be closed unless he can write and produce a hit play, teacher Steve Coogan has only one idea: Make a musical sequel to “Hamlet.”

Contact Daniel Neman at (804) 649-6408 or .